Dafuck makes this?
Lee Sanger Goldin leads a life of thrilling adventure, trotting the globe in search of danger and daring-do. In his brief stints stateside, he records this podcast in a derelict subway station beneath the streets of Manhattan. He has killed Hitler in 18 alternate realities and can hold his breath for 3 days under water. Genetically, he was created in a laboratory using the DNA of Orson Welles, Elvis Presley and Ingrid Bergman. He has authored several novels under the pen names Tom Clancy, John Grisham, Michael Chricton and Amy Tan. He played second trumpet on the third album of a San Diego-based Ska band that was killed in a freak cement accident in the summer of 1995. He has at least 32 children with 43 women, all of whom only speak with him on his birthday, which occurs on a leap year. Lee Sanger Goldin renounces all faiths despite being chosen by the Hebrew God Adonai to rid the world of Oxford commas. He only drinks antisocially. This website will self-destruct in 87 days.